Another funny Quote

I have a friend who has a child who is (for generic terms) sick. So, illness and the possibility of death often come into our conversations between her child being sick and my job. Religious/spiritual beliefs often come up as well.

Today, we had a very odd conversation (well, other people will probably find it odd) and it ended with what I found to be a hilarious quote from her.

Somehow we got on the topic of people being "cured by God". The quotes are mine, not hers. Since I do not believe in God, I feel pretty cynical about this issue. I try not to . . . but I can't help it. And, I told her that I didn't feel God was going around and touching children/people and curing them. She said that she felt it was possible, but not likely. I like that we can have opposing views and not argue about it.

But, she was telling me about a family of a hospice patient she had assisted with. When the patient died, they wanted the hospital to leave the deceased relative in the hospital bed for 24 hours in case God wanted to bring her back to life/cure her.

I got a good laugh out of this. I asked my friend why God couldn't "cure" her if she was down in the morgue? Would he not be able to find her? Did he not have access to the morgue?

And my friend's reply was . . . "God can cure cancer, but he can't defrost you."

I pointed out the following:

1. You aren't frozen in the morgue . . . you are in a cooler.

2. And, if God could do something as big as bring you back to life . . . would it matter if your body temperature was a little lower than the room temp?

So, there it is . . . God has limits.

It made sense when I said it . . .

There's nothing worse than a high cow .. . well, except for raisin cupcakes of course.

I've heard of spanking the monkey . . .

but not washing the monkey.

Which came first?

The chicken or the egg?

WHO CARES!

Wyatt originally wanted to be a vacuum cleaner for Halloween. I thought that I was going to end up making a costume for him.

But, life is just too busy and I'm not talented enough.

So, a friend of mine mentioned a few weeks ago that a certain second-hand children's store had put out their Halloween costumes and they were reasonably priced. She bought one for her daughter.

Today, after buying a birthday gift for a friend, I popped into the store to look at Halloween costumes.

There seemed to be no organization to the racks and I didn't feel like sorting thru things. I asked one of the clerks how they were organized. She said that they weren't. I sighed and cruised thru them again. But, I just couldn't find what I was looking for quickly enough. My head started to pound. I decided to give up. As I turned and took one last look, a chicken costume caught my eye. It was hanging up really high on the wall.

I asked the clerk what size it was and she didn't know. But, she offered to get it down for me to look. She glanced at the tag and told me there was no size on it but I was welcome to look at it and to just hang it up on a rack when I was done. Obviously, she does not work on commission.

I looked in it and the size tag was still there . . . it was a 2T-3T. PERFECT! So, I got it. It was only $7!

Wyatt will love being a chicken and getting to say bawk bawk. He does it in such a cute way. . . well, I think so because he's mine.

My brain has paused

for station identification.

Besides life being the usual hectic thing, I had a migraine Saturday and Sunday that has caused my life to pause.

It always takes at least a day to get back into the swing of things after a migraine, but this one really did me in.

I'm still having a little problem with my vision. I'm also just getting over dropping everything, switching words around and forgetting words that I typically use.

But, I'm hoping that today things will get more back to normal. . . or at least my defitinion of normal.

Last night, Scott was talking to Trina on the phone about her lawn mower. I know, facinating stuff. I was playing a game on Bob and half-ass listening to his side of the conversation. Since I don't like to talk on the phone, I typically relay information thru him when he's on the phone to someone so that I don't have to get on the phone.

Well, Scott said something about it not being easy to remember things and it had something to do with living with me. I filed that in the back of my brain . . . not really thinking that it would come back up.

But, this morning it did . . . in a weird way. So, I decided to look online to find ways to make working more efficient. Since I have an email inbox, a physical inbox, multiple stacks of paper on my desk, stuff on my printer that I have printed out to remind me of things to do, my handwritten to do list and reminders on my Outlook . . .things get a little hairy. How best to handle it? Let's ignore all of them and surf the internet to figure out how to deal with them. Long live the Queen of Procrastination, huh?

I ran across some interesting things under Zen Habits. That led me to look at something else and then read yet something else. Then, something struck home. The guy talked about not being able to filter things properly. In other words, he was so busy "logging" things that he wanted to remember, that he logged things he didn't need to or forgot why he thought he would be interested in them.

Anyone who knows me well knows that there is no filter between my brain and my mouth. What I think comes out . . . unfortunately. If you want an honest opinion, I'm the person to ask.

But, that's not where I was going with this. I can't filter out information that I don't need or recall it later when I DO need it. I have no spam filter on my brain.

For instance, last week, I was reading Reader's Digest (yes, I'm an old woman at heart) and found an article about saving money. It included lots of tips including several websites where you can get great coupons or coupon codes. I keep meaning to pull those websites out of the article and mark them as favorites in Bob. But, I never seem to get that far.

Yesterday, I decided that I need diapers. Since I ordered from diapers.com last time and was really happy (free shipping, they came the next day and $10 off my order) I decided I would do it again.

Alas, my code doesn't work since I'm not a first time shopper. Didn't I get a code to use earler this month via email as a returning customer? I think I did . . . but I can't find it. I then spent the next 30 minutes trying to find a code that WOULD work. I could have driven to Sam's Club and bought the damn things by now. But, my mind is convinced that I should be getting them delivered to me and delivery should be free.

See what I mean? There's so much stuff floating around that I can't sort it out. Last night I had a moment of inspiration. I need a little notebook to put in my purse to write things down . . . wait a minute, I have one . . .


Where was I going with this?

Peas and Carrots JEN NAY!

Ok, the Jenny that I am referring to will get the title . . .and be horrified that I am using it in my blog and adding her story to my story.

Earlier this summer, Jenny, Trina and I got together for lunch. This is a guaranteed laugh riot.

So, at some point, I catch Jenny telling Trina something along the lines that the chipmunk bit her.

I'm not really sure what I was doing that I missed the first part of the story . . . I was probably playing with my Blackberry, Bob.

But, I stopped the conversation at that point and made her start over.

Apparently, she was outside and saw a cat attacking a chipmunk. So, Jenny held the cat at bay (and this is where it gets funny), leaned down and picked up the chipmunk to "save" it. What did she get for saving its life? It bit her. She then threw it to the ground which probabaly made it a retarded chipmunk. That's a funny picture right there. I asked her why she just didn't squirt them with a garden hose. Surely they would each have run away. Or, at least be so stunned that the cat would stop attacking the chipmunk.

So, a few weeks ago, I was coming in the house and saw something moving in our little plastic pond. I figured it was a frog and I went over to check. For those of you not familiar with my strange ways, I am facinated by turtles and frogs. I rarely see one that I dont pick it up and fiddle with it for a little bit.

When I got closer, I realized it was a chipmunk in the pond. Apparently, he had slipped into it and couldn't get out because the edges are straight up and down and the water level was too low for him to grip the rim. Last year I found a dead baby mole in the pond for the same reason. I have considered posting a sign that says "No lifeguard on duty" to help alleviate the issue.

Now, I am normally one to let nature take its course. But, I didn't want to have to nag my husband about fishing out the dead chipmunk for a week.

So, I ran inside and grabbed the large purple plastic bowl that we use for Halloween candy. Don't ask why it was so handy. It's another story.

Then, I ran out to the pond, scooped up the chipmunk with as little water in the bowl as possible and dumped him out on to the ground.

He stood there panting for a few seconds and then skittered away. I did stop to take a picture of him before I rescued him. You know me, I have to have pictures of everything.

I AM NOT A TREE HUGGER, NOR DO I THINK I CAN SAVE THE WORLD. But, that had to be good for my Karma, right? And, I didn't get bit in the process.

Disco Baby!

Today, in a roundabout way, I ended up on the subject of disco and it brought back a lot of memories. Here's the first album that I bought with my own money. It's just one song, but it's hilarious to think I wanted this album so badly.

I have been sadly lacking in blogging lately.

It's not that nothing has happened. It's just that I've been too busy and too tired to get anything organized.

I have several topics from the past few weeks that I wanted to talk about. But, when Michelle sent this to me, it trumped everything else.