Since I won a new digital camera at the company Christmas party, I can finally take short videos (that are good enough quality to post here) and show them on the blog without having to drag out our actual video camera.
Since Wyatt has decided that he doesn't want me to rock him before he goes to sleep anymore, I have a new favorite time of the day.
Scott gets him undressed in the living room and he runs buck naked to the bathroom.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Monday, October 08, 2007
It's a Daisy!
We finally decided that Wyatt is ready for a dog.
So, here she is . . . introducing Daisy.
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
My karma needs a caffeine boost
Apparently, I have not been doing enough nice things lately. Today, my karma kicked my butt.
It started off with me hitting a rabbit on the way to Nana's. That's not enough to really make me think my karma is off kilter. I hit 3 squirrels in the last week too. Still didn't make me think about my karma.
However, when I went to the gas station to get my morning Mt. Dew, I picked up a cup, checked it to make sure there were no surprises in it (Don't ask, it's part of the OCD) and then decided to get something to eat while I waited for the pop machine to clear out a little. There were several people all trying to get their morning dose. Well, I whipped around and stepped towards the snacks and walked right smack dab into some guy's armpit. He apparently was right behind me and leaning (ever so quietly) over me to get a lid.
I got quite the laugh about it and STILL didn't think about my karma.
Then, I got into my car, drove a few blocks, picked up my styrofoam clad Mt. Dew (to hell with the environment, I like my pop REALLY cold) and the bottom cracked and broke. I managed to miss my lap with it, but the passenger side floorboard got quite the bath.
Oh well. I guess I need to be nicer.
It started off with me hitting a rabbit on the way to Nana's. That's not enough to really make me think my karma is off kilter. I hit 3 squirrels in the last week too. Still didn't make me think about my karma.
However, when I went to the gas station to get my morning Mt. Dew, I picked up a cup, checked it to make sure there were no surprises in it (Don't ask, it's part of the OCD) and then decided to get something to eat while I waited for the pop machine to clear out a little. There were several people all trying to get their morning dose. Well, I whipped around and stepped towards the snacks and walked right smack dab into some guy's armpit. He apparently was right behind me and leaning (ever so quietly) over me to get a lid.
I got quite the laugh about it and STILL didn't think about my karma.
Then, I got into my car, drove a few blocks, picked up my styrofoam clad Mt. Dew (to hell with the environment, I like my pop REALLY cold) and the bottom cracked and broke. I managed to miss my lap with it, but the passenger side floorboard got quite the bath.
Oh well. I guess I need to be nicer.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Things Done and Marked Off THE LIST
I keep a never-ending to do list in my mind. I try to put as much of it as possible on paper, but that would be one more thing to do . . . and doesn't usually happen except on the weekends. But, here is what I've done since Friday. WARNING: Not a whole lot of exciting things, but some good things.
1. Friday morning I got most of the way to Nana's and realized I didn't have my cell phone. No big deal since Friday's are a half day at work during the summer. EXCEPT, we were due to close on refinancing our house. So, in the spirit of not wanting to miss the person doing the closing if they called, I trucked back to the house, got my phone, and then decided to make a second stop at the gas station. The first was for gas. The second was because I needed some caffeine right away.
2. Worked. Ok, not exciting, but I did it.
3. Trucked BACK to Nana's. Said good bye to his great grandmother since she's been visiting with Nana all week.
4. Went back home, fed Wyatt, closed on the house.
5. Went to Martinsville and saw Trina's new house. It's great! Lots of space and a really awesome floor plan.
6. Went to Rural King to get two 6 volt batteries for the hubby. Don't ask.
7. Went BACK to Nana's to deliver the batteries to hubby.
8. Went BACK to Martinsville to pick up dinner.
9. Put the child to bed and fell into bed absolutely exhausted.
10. Saturday, I got up, did a load of laundry, unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher. Did a few other random chores, started the vacuum robot and headed out to meet hubby at a friend's house for lunch. This friend lost his wife last year to cancer. He has a new girlfriend and it was my chance to meet her. It was also our friend's chance to see Wyatt for the first time.
11. Called my mom.
12. Came home and did more random chores, including washing the sheets and taking care of the child.
13. Made a coconut cheesecake, baked beans and deviled eggs for Sunday after running into town to the store.
14. Cleaned and put several bags of green peppers in the freezer.
15. Sunday I did some more chores, including unloading and reloading the dishwasher and and starting a load of laundry.
16. Went to Nana's for an awesome cookout. Besides what I brought, there were fresh green beans, ribs, deer meat, brats, mashed potatoes, blackberry cobbler and squash pie.
17. While at Nana's, got the chance to help with the garden. We picked corn, green beans and tomatoes.
18. Went BACK to Martinsville for baby supplies for Nana.
19. Came home and did more chores. That included the whole week's worth of clean laundry that needed to be folded or hung up and put away.
20. Packed Wyatt's bag for Nana's house today.
1. Friday morning I got most of the way to Nana's and realized I didn't have my cell phone. No big deal since Friday's are a half day at work during the summer. EXCEPT, we were due to close on refinancing our house. So, in the spirit of not wanting to miss the person doing the closing if they called, I trucked back to the house, got my phone, and then decided to make a second stop at the gas station. The first was for gas. The second was because I needed some caffeine right away.
2. Worked. Ok, not exciting, but I did it.
3. Trucked BACK to Nana's. Said good bye to his great grandmother since she's been visiting with Nana all week.
4. Went back home, fed Wyatt, closed on the house.
5. Went to Martinsville and saw Trina's new house. It's great! Lots of space and a really awesome floor plan.
6. Went to Rural King to get two 6 volt batteries for the hubby. Don't ask.
7. Went BACK to Nana's to deliver the batteries to hubby.
8. Went BACK to Martinsville to pick up dinner.
9. Put the child to bed and fell into bed absolutely exhausted.
10. Saturday, I got up, did a load of laundry, unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher. Did a few other random chores, started the vacuum robot and headed out to meet hubby at a friend's house for lunch. This friend lost his wife last year to cancer. He has a new girlfriend and it was my chance to meet her. It was also our friend's chance to see Wyatt for the first time.
11. Called my mom.
12. Came home and did more random chores, including washing the sheets and taking care of the child.
13. Made a coconut cheesecake, baked beans and deviled eggs for Sunday after running into town to the store.
14. Cleaned and put several bags of green peppers in the freezer.
15. Sunday I did some more chores, including unloading and reloading the dishwasher and and starting a load of laundry.
16. Went to Nana's for an awesome cookout. Besides what I brought, there were fresh green beans, ribs, deer meat, brats, mashed potatoes, blackberry cobbler and squash pie.
17. While at Nana's, got the chance to help with the garden. We picked corn, green beans and tomatoes.
18. Went BACK to Martinsville for baby supplies for Nana.
19. Came home and did more chores. That included the whole week's worth of clean laundry that needed to be folded or hung up and put away.
20. Packed Wyatt's bag for Nana's house today.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Ok, so I WASN'T Back
Time flies . . . we went to the Indianapolis Zoo a few weeks ago. I'm going to post the pictures here. It was a beautiful day and we all had a lot of fun.
The new Waters building was a bit disappointing . . . and the petting zoo is gone, but overall it was a great day.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Ok, I'm back . . . I think
So, I've been feeling guilty the last several weeks for not putting anything on the blog. . . and lots of things have happened. But, I was having problems posting the rest of the pictures from the trip to the Children's Museum and my flash drive is full. I need to unload it on my computer but that means I need to properly label and file all of the things on it and it just seems like too much.
But, I'll do a quick fill in.
Last week, Wyatt appeared to come down with a pretty bad cold. We were due for a check up (post-surgery) with the pediatric urologist. And, since we see him in our pediatrician's office, I made an appointment to see the Nurse Practitioner right before seeing the "winkie" doctor.
The nurse said it's just a cold basically. Ok, nothing I can do but treat the fever and the cough/runny nose. By the way, that was on a Friday and the fever didn't break until Monday.
The "winkie" doctor said he was done with us. Everything looked great and he said that we had no more use for him. I felt like someone had just dumped me suddenly. But, it's a good thing. It was just weird walking out of the office knowing that we were done with something that took up so much energy in the worrying part of my life.
On Sunday night we got a call from Nana. Her dad was in the hospital again and they were sure he had spinal meningitis. Ok, so now we've all been exposed. Great.
I called into work to deal with Wyatt's fever and to await the test results on Scott's grandpa. It came back negative.
Then she called to say that the hospital called to say he probably wouldn't make it thru the night and for the family to come say their last goodbyes. I couldn't take Wyatt because he was sick.
And, he wasn't responding to anyone, so I felt it would be a moot point. I told Scott to go if he wanted and I would stay home with Wyatt. He chose not to go.
Tuesday I finally got back to work and found out that his grandfather had lived thru the night, but is living on borrowed time.
I picked Wyatt up from Nana's on Tuesday and she thought he had the chicken pox. I called the urgent care clinic and they said it was probably chicken pox and it would just run its course. I wasn't so sure that it was chicken pox.
So, I ran home, got a bottle and headed to the clinic. They made us go thru the back door and stay away from all of the other patients.
It's hives. The child has encountered something that he's allergic to. I can't for the life of me figure out what it is except that they gave him Albuterol to soothe his cough. I only gave him one dose of it.
So, no chicken pox.
On a lighter note, I have decided to join the scrapbooking world. I bought a magazine and spoke to a coworker about what I needed to get started.
I made a trip to Hobby Lobby during their 50% off sale and bought quite a bit to get me started.
And, she was selling some stuff so I bought quite a bit from her.
Now all I need is the time and space to get started. . . we'll see.
But, I'll do a quick fill in.
Last week, Wyatt appeared to come down with a pretty bad cold. We were due for a check up (post-surgery) with the pediatric urologist. And, since we see him in our pediatrician's office, I made an appointment to see the Nurse Practitioner right before seeing the "winkie" doctor.
The nurse said it's just a cold basically. Ok, nothing I can do but treat the fever and the cough/runny nose. By the way, that was on a Friday and the fever didn't break until Monday.
The "winkie" doctor said he was done with us. Everything looked great and he said that we had no more use for him. I felt like someone had just dumped me suddenly. But, it's a good thing. It was just weird walking out of the office knowing that we were done with something that took up so much energy in the worrying part of my life.
On Sunday night we got a call from Nana. Her dad was in the hospital again and they were sure he had spinal meningitis. Ok, so now we've all been exposed. Great.
I called into work to deal with Wyatt's fever and to await the test results on Scott's grandpa. It came back negative.
Then she called to say that the hospital called to say he probably wouldn't make it thru the night and for the family to come say their last goodbyes. I couldn't take Wyatt because he was sick.
And, he wasn't responding to anyone, so I felt it would be a moot point. I told Scott to go if he wanted and I would stay home with Wyatt. He chose not to go.
Tuesday I finally got back to work and found out that his grandfather had lived thru the night, but is living on borrowed time.
I picked Wyatt up from Nana's on Tuesday and she thought he had the chicken pox. I called the urgent care clinic and they said it was probably chicken pox and it would just run its course. I wasn't so sure that it was chicken pox.
So, I ran home, got a bottle and headed to the clinic. They made us go thru the back door and stay away from all of the other patients.
It's hives. The child has encountered something that he's allergic to. I can't for the life of me figure out what it is except that they gave him Albuterol to soothe his cough. I only gave him one dose of it.
So, no chicken pox.
On a lighter note, I have decided to join the scrapbooking world. I bought a magazine and spoke to a coworker about what I needed to get started.
I made a trip to Hobby Lobby during their 50% off sale and bought quite a bit to get me started.
And, she was selling some stuff so I bought quite a bit from her.
Now all I need is the time and space to get started. . . we'll see.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Monday, May 07, 2007
This weekend
I got up Saturday morning and randomly decided that we should go to The Children's Museum in Indianapolis.
After some frantic packing (having Wyatt on milk instead of formula throws everything off), we set out around 10 am.
We got there and had lunch in the food court and toured the museum. Most of the stuff is really geared for closer to 3 and up. But, we had fun as a family. Daddy even turned off his cell phone after taking 2 phone calls before we got out of the food court and into the museum.
We stopped at the museum gift shop on the way out and bought Wyatt a stuffed dinosaur. I have pictures of the trip to the museum (just a few) but need to get them off of the camera.
Yesterday we spent around the house doing not a lot of anything. We did drop Wyatt off at Nana's for about an hour while we went fishing. I can't say that the fishing was that great. It was really windy and the fish weren't biting a whole lot. I took a couple of pictures and then just sat there and vegged out for a while.
Last Thursday we took Wyatt to get his 1 year shots. He weighs not quite 24 pounds and is a little over 32 in. tall. Since he's walking, I'll call it tall and not long.
Other than that, it wasn't a very exciting week. Hopefully this week will be quiet too. I think we might go to the zoo this weekend . . .
After some frantic packing (having Wyatt on milk instead of formula throws everything off), we set out around 10 am.
We got there and had lunch in the food court and toured the museum. Most of the stuff is really geared for closer to 3 and up. But, we had fun as a family. Daddy even turned off his cell phone after taking 2 phone calls before we got out of the food court and into the museum.
We stopped at the museum gift shop on the way out and bought Wyatt a stuffed dinosaur. I have pictures of the trip to the museum (just a few) but need to get them off of the camera.
Yesterday we spent around the house doing not a lot of anything. We did drop Wyatt off at Nana's for about an hour while we went fishing. I can't say that the fishing was that great. It was really windy and the fish weren't biting a whole lot. I took a couple of pictures and then just sat there and vegged out for a while.
Last Thursday we took Wyatt to get his 1 year shots. He weighs not quite 24 pounds and is a little over 32 in. tall. Since he's walking, I'll call it tall and not long.
Other than that, it wasn't a very exciting week. Hopefully this week will be quiet too. I think we might go to the zoo this weekend . . .
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
The Swing Set
Daddy decided that Wyatt needed a swing set . . . after I suggested that we just buy a swing for outside. So, off he went to the store and spent an entire day getting everything and putting it together. Here are some of the pictures of Wyatt taking it for a test drive and just wandering around the yard.
Friday, April 27, 2007
Today's Thought . . . and Rant
Ok, so I'm not a person who is technologically-deficient. However, I DO have my limitations. I love being able to LEAVE voice mails . . . I hate GETTING voice mails. I love taking digital pictures, but don't sort or label them very well. And, if it hadn't been for the Geek Squad suggesting a backup drive, I would never have backed up my personal computer in my life until a few months ago. Now, it backs up my computer nightly for me. I loathe checking my personal emails and keep it to a minimum. But, I have been working hard at "improving" my blog. In other words, I'm cluttering it up but feeling like I'm finally catching up to the rest of the world. There are still several things that I have seen on other blogs that I think are totally cool but haven't figured out how to accomplish yet. And, since I'm the QUEEN OF PROCRASTINATION (those of you know me well, stop laughing and continue reading), I always put off learning how to do those things. But, I'm working on it. Seriously. Stop laughing again, MICHELLE.
And, speaking of Michelle, she is responsible for me not only starting this blog, but surfing other blogs, reading Stephen Brust's books . . . which has become an addiction and teaching me to love my jump drive and to carry it with me every day. Yes, in my pocket (along with my pocket knife) I carry my jump drive. I'm becoming a pseudo-geek. It's kind of like being a closet Trekkie. I'm not one of those people who dress up and go to the conventions. I don't read the books . . . although I read the book that Leonard Nimoy wrote about doing Star Trek. And, I don't schedule my life around Star Trek series or movies. But, if I'm flipping thru the channels and there is one on, I'm apt to watch it.
Anyway, that's today's thought. I'm becoming a techno and blog junkie. That little Next Blog button calls my name whenever I log in.
And, last week I was indulging in that vice (one of many) when lo and behold, what should pop up but a blog from a person who was commenting on something happening in their small town. I started perusing thru it and found it funny, touching and . . . ummmm, interesting. As I was scrolling thru the posts, I saw one that talked about going to a certain southern city for vacation. It had a picture with it. When I looked at the picture, I thought that the person in it looked a lot like a co-worker at my former place of employment. The next picture showed someone that looked a lot like ANOTHER co-worker at my former place of employment. It had a caption with it and gave the first name of the person. The name was the same as the person that I was thinking of. I enlarged the picture, went back to the first picture, enlarged it and then had to pick up my jaw from the floor. IT WAS THEM! I had accidentally stumbled upon the blog of a former co-worker. I am not naming names because the person has a blog title that obviously keeps them from being identified unless you really know them.
Anyway, the funny thing was to be able to read things from their personal point of view. There were things in there that I knew. Things that I was not surprised by. There were nicknames galore, but I think I decoded several of them since I know that person . . . but there were things there that totally shocked me. . . personal things. Nothing about me . . . things about that person. In particular, there was a list of "Things about Me". You know, those lists where you tell so many things about yourself that others may not know . . .or things that you think are important to your personality. There were things in that list that I think that person would not necessarily want shared with the people they work with . . . I don't know, I could be wrong. But, let's say I had a love for . . . . oh. . . "adult entertainment". I'll leave the rest up to your imagination. I wouldn't necessarily want to share that with my co-workers. Now, I know the odds of someone he/she didn't want to see that stumbling upon it by hitting the Next Blog button are not very good. But, it happened.
The blog also had some great entries that I enjoyed. It would be a blog I would LOVE to have a link to so that other people could share it. But, I obviously don't want to jeopardize that person's privacy. So, I keep the blog in my memory (what there is left of it) and check it out every few days.
Which leads me (in my roundabout way) to my rant . . . about technology.
If there's one thing I can't stand . . . and I know it's the "in" thing . . .it's text messaging. I hate it for a couple of reasons. One, can you not just pick up the phone and call the person? Even I (who hates to talk on the phone) will eventually give in and pick up the phone if I need to speak to someone.
The other thing I can't stand about it is that it's giving a whole generation a serious lack of personal interaction (which I think is important to your growth) and spelling! Ok, I'm not the world's best speller . . . but I'm pretty good. And, even I make typos and I totally understand that other people do too . . . even with spell check. But I can't stand all this short hand that they use. It's used in instant messaging too. I hate that too, for the same reasons. I'm sure everyone thinks that instant messaging is old-fashioned now.
Now here comes the part where I am a total hyppocrite because I am blogging this . . .
PEOPLE - GET OUT FROM BEHIND YOUR STUPID COMPUTER AND INTERACT WITH SOME REAL PEOPLE!
Ok, enough said. I'm stepping down from the soapbox . . . with egg on my face as a blog addict.
And, speaking of Michelle, she is responsible for me not only starting this blog, but surfing other blogs, reading Stephen Brust's books . . . which has become an addiction and teaching me to love my jump drive and to carry it with me every day. Yes, in my pocket (along with my pocket knife) I carry my jump drive. I'm becoming a pseudo-geek. It's kind of like being a closet Trekkie. I'm not one of those people who dress up and go to the conventions. I don't read the books . . . although I read the book that Leonard Nimoy wrote about doing Star Trek. And, I don't schedule my life around Star Trek series or movies. But, if I'm flipping thru the channels and there is one on, I'm apt to watch it.
Anyway, that's today's thought. I'm becoming a techno and blog junkie. That little Next Blog button calls my name whenever I log in.
And, last week I was indulging in that vice (one of many) when lo and behold, what should pop up but a blog from a person who was commenting on something happening in their small town. I started perusing thru it and found it funny, touching and . . . ummmm, interesting. As I was scrolling thru the posts, I saw one that talked about going to a certain southern city for vacation. It had a picture with it. When I looked at the picture, I thought that the person in it looked a lot like a co-worker at my former place of employment. The next picture showed someone that looked a lot like ANOTHER co-worker at my former place of employment. It had a caption with it and gave the first name of the person. The name was the same as the person that I was thinking of. I enlarged the picture, went back to the first picture, enlarged it and then had to pick up my jaw from the floor. IT WAS THEM! I had accidentally stumbled upon the blog of a former co-worker. I am not naming names because the person has a blog title that obviously keeps them from being identified unless you really know them.
Anyway, the funny thing was to be able to read things from their personal point of view. There were things in there that I knew. Things that I was not surprised by. There were nicknames galore, but I think I decoded several of them since I know that person . . . but there were things there that totally shocked me. . . personal things. Nothing about me . . . things about that person. In particular, there was a list of "Things about Me". You know, those lists where you tell so many things about yourself that others may not know . . .or things that you think are important to your personality. There were things in that list that I think that person would not necessarily want shared with the people they work with . . . I don't know, I could be wrong. But, let's say I had a love for . . . . oh. . . "adult entertainment". I'll leave the rest up to your imagination. I wouldn't necessarily want to share that with my co-workers. Now, I know the odds of someone he/she didn't want to see that stumbling upon it by hitting the Next Blog button are not very good. But, it happened.
The blog also had some great entries that I enjoyed. It would be a blog I would LOVE to have a link to so that other people could share it. But, I obviously don't want to jeopardize that person's privacy. So, I keep the blog in my memory (what there is left of it) and check it out every few days.
Which leads me (in my roundabout way) to my rant . . . about technology.
If there's one thing I can't stand . . . and I know it's the "in" thing . . .it's text messaging. I hate it for a couple of reasons. One, can you not just pick up the phone and call the person? Even I (who hates to talk on the phone) will eventually give in and pick up the phone if I need to speak to someone.
The other thing I can't stand about it is that it's giving a whole generation a serious lack of personal interaction (which I think is important to your growth) and spelling! Ok, I'm not the world's best speller . . . but I'm pretty good. And, even I make typos and I totally understand that other people do too . . . even with spell check. But I can't stand all this short hand that they use. It's used in instant messaging too. I hate that too, for the same reasons. I'm sure everyone thinks that instant messaging is old-fashioned now.
Now here comes the part where I am a total hyppocrite because I am blogging this . . .
PEOPLE - GET OUT FROM BEHIND YOUR STUPID COMPUTER AND INTERACT WITH SOME REAL PEOPLE!
Ok, enough said. I'm stepping down from the soapbox . . . with egg on my face as a blog addict.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
The Tractor
We got Wyatt this little tractor for his birthday. He likes to "work" on the wheels. When you open up the seat, there are 4 little farm animals in it. When you "plug" one into the little spots under the seat, it makes the animal sound. It's pretty cool!
Birthday, balloons and bubbles
The balloons tied to the bottles of bubbles were a huge hit!
Since it was a last minute thought, I had no idea that they
would go over so well, but they did. Wyatt had lots of fun
chewing on the bubbles and popping the balloons.
Since it was a last minute thought, I had no idea that they
would go over so well, but they did. Wyatt had lots of fun
chewing on the bubbles and popping the balloons.
The Dynamic Duo
Here is the Dynamic Duo in action. The boy in the striped shirt is Michael. He lives across the road from us and is about 8 weeks older than Wyatt.
The Ultimate Wagon
Grandma and Grandpa Freeman got Wyatt the ULTIMATE WAGON (and a trike) for his birthday. This thing is the Cadillac of wagons. Here's a picture of Grandpa pulling Wyatt in the wagon and also a picture of the wagon being used to haul off Wyatt's birthday loot.
The Birthday Cake
Here is Wyatt's big cake and the small cake that we got just for him.
He played in his personal cake for a few minutes and then was done.
The party's over . . . YAY!
Friday I spent the day getting some last minute errands done to get ready for the party.
First, since I had the day off, I had our new refrigerator and stove delivered.
Then, I was off to the bank and to a customer's to pick up a check.
Then, I went to the Factory Card Outlet to get the bow, ribbon, wrapping paper, birthday sign and streamers that I needed. While I was there, it dawned on me that I could use small bottles of bubbles to anchor down the baloons. I got the idea when I passed by an endcap that had 6 packs of bubbles.
I also took some time to clean out my car and go thru the car wash.
First, since I had the day off, I had our new refrigerator and stove delivered.
Then, I was off to the bank and to a customer's to pick up a check.
Then, I went to the Factory Card Outlet to get the bow, ribbon, wrapping paper, birthday sign and streamers that I needed. While I was there, it dawned on me that I could use small bottles of bubbles to anchor down the baloons. I got the idea when I passed by an endcap that had 6 packs of bubbles.
I also took some time to clean out my car and go thru the car wash.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
Diary of a Dog
EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY
Day number 1808:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
Day number 1818:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
Day number 1808:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
Day number 1818:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
Diary of a Cat
Diary of a Cat
DAY 752: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.
DAY 761: Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.
DAY 762: Slept all day so that I could annoy my captors with sleep depriving, incessant pleas for food at ungodly hours of the night.
DAY 765: Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan..
DAY 768: I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid? My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.
DAY 771: There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer." More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.
DAY 774: I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The Bird on the other hand has got to be an informant. He has mastered their frightful tongue (something akin to molespeak) and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait; it is only a matter of time...
And the plan ensues . . .
Ok, so the birthday gifts arrived via UPS and the additional party supplies arrived via UPS.
So, now I'm down to the balloon ribbon and possibly streamers . . .
And, when I go to pick up the cake I need:
1. Ice
2. Ice Cream
3. Pop
I also need to clean out our cooler and charge up the camcorder. Oh, and I think I need a birthday sign to put up on the fence at the front of the driveway.
Not too bad. Then, I just have to get all of that (and the high chair) to the party. Setting up shouldn't be too hard.
Oh, and I guess I need a birthday card and some wrapping paper . . . I keep adding things to the list.
Once again, I need a personal assistant who will work for free.
So, now I'm down to the balloon ribbon and possibly streamers . . .
And, when I go to pick up the cake I need:
1. Ice
2. Ice Cream
3. Pop
I also need to clean out our cooler and charge up the camcorder. Oh, and I think I need a birthday sign to put up on the fence at the front of the driveway.
Not too bad. Then, I just have to get all of that (and the high chair) to the party. Setting up shouldn't be too hard.
Oh, and I guess I need a birthday card and some wrapping paper . . . I keep adding things to the list.
Once again, I need a personal assistant who will work for free.
Monday, April 16, 2007
Wyatt's Horoscope for Today
Wyatt is a cusp baby . . . so depending on which source you choose, he is either an Aries or a Taurus, usually a Taurus.
So here's his horoscope today:
You may find yourself relaxing with refreshments mid-morning. (Ok, that's no big surprise)
Later today, you will be quite busy. (Doing what? Drooling?)
If you are looking for a job, you may think the Internet is the only way to achieve that goal. It may help, but there is nothing like knocking on a few doors, so-to-speak. If you are not looking for a job, a friend of yours may be looking. (Ok, I don't let him use the internet and his typing skills are sub-par at best. Although, he should probably start looking for a job NOW in this market.)
You will exert much effort into making everything work today. Your sense of direction is in high focus and many difficult issues will soon fall into place; you achieve a new understanding. (It takes a lot of effort for him to just stand up and take a few steps.)
Others may find you especially witty. (Nana always finds him witty)
It could be you take public transportation or you ride in an elevator every day; whatever the case, you are loved. (That whole sentence just sounds like a translation error)
Family, friends and strangers enjoy your company. (True)
Enjoy a walk this evening. (A walk? Does 5-6 steps count as a walk?)
So here's his horoscope today:
You may find yourself relaxing with refreshments mid-morning. (Ok, that's no big surprise)
Later today, you will be quite busy. (Doing what? Drooling?)
If you are looking for a job, you may think the Internet is the only way to achieve that goal. It may help, but there is nothing like knocking on a few doors, so-to-speak. If you are not looking for a job, a friend of yours may be looking. (Ok, I don't let him use the internet and his typing skills are sub-par at best. Although, he should probably start looking for a job NOW in this market.)
You will exert much effort into making everything work today. Your sense of direction is in high focus and many difficult issues will soon fall into place; you achieve a new understanding. (It takes a lot of effort for him to just stand up and take a few steps.)
Others may find you especially witty. (Nana always finds him witty)
It could be you take public transportation or you ride in an elevator every day; whatever the case, you are loved. (That whole sentence just sounds like a translation error)
Family, friends and strangers enjoy your company. (True)
Enjoy a walk this evening. (A walk? Does 5-6 steps count as a walk?)
The countdown begins . . . again
Friday I realized that one year ago had been Wyatt's actual due date. However, I think he has Mama's procrastination gene and didn't want to show up. I had planned for that . . .and so had the doctor and we had made an appointment for the 14th just in case I hadn't gone into labor. On the 14th, I didn't get to see my regular doctor and the one that I DID see said that he wanted to wait until I saw Dr. Eads next week before inducing. So, I went to the mall, went to the paint store and went home and painted the nursery . . . and was furious that I was going to continue to be pregnant.
So, the countdown begins again, but this time for Wyatt's birthday. I sent the invitations out over a week ago and did a quick head count on Friday to discover that more people had RSVP'd than I had bought supplies for. OOOPS! Apparently, we had invited about 50 people. I didn't realize that. I bought supplies for about 24 people. And, by my best guess, we should have 30-40 people coming. So, yesterday, I got online and ordered some extra supplies, just in case.
I also had a message on the voice mail Thursday to call the place I had ordered Wyatt's gifts from. They informed me that the big item that I had chosen (after weeks of deciding) was out of stock. However, the guy who called was wonderful and found a suitable replacement for me over the phone and even gave it to me at a slight discount for the inconvenience. That was so great of him. I was at the doctor's office and didn't have access to go thru the online catalog. When I explained what we were looking for and Wyatt's age, he took the time to find something for me. He said that it would ship the next day and go out UPS. We'll probably get it today or tomorrow I'm guess. I think the extra party supplies should be here Tuesday or Wednesday.
Saturday I called and changed our cake order to the next larger cake. I didn't want to cut tiny pieces or run out of cake. I guess we'll just have some cake left over. It's supposed to be 75 on Saturday, so it should be a beautiful day for this birthday. I wish I knew what it was like on the day he was born. But, I had already been in the hospital for 2 days and had no idea.
So, that leaves me with buying ice cream, ice, party favors and pop. I'd also like to find some green and yellow ribbon for the balloons to go with the theme, but I'll live with whatever I can find. So far, no luck.
I figure that I can pick up the ice, ice cream and pop when I pick up the cake. Scott said he would try to take Friday off to help get his parents' property ready for the party. I'm getting really excited. I can't believe it's almost here!
So, the countdown begins again, but this time for Wyatt's birthday. I sent the invitations out over a week ago and did a quick head count on Friday to discover that more people had RSVP'd than I had bought supplies for. OOOPS! Apparently, we had invited about 50 people. I didn't realize that. I bought supplies for about 24 people. And, by my best guess, we should have 30-40 people coming. So, yesterday, I got online and ordered some extra supplies, just in case.
I also had a message on the voice mail Thursday to call the place I had ordered Wyatt's gifts from. They informed me that the big item that I had chosen (after weeks of deciding) was out of stock. However, the guy who called was wonderful and found a suitable replacement for me over the phone and even gave it to me at a slight discount for the inconvenience. That was so great of him. I was at the doctor's office and didn't have access to go thru the online catalog. When I explained what we were looking for and Wyatt's age, he took the time to find something for me. He said that it would ship the next day and go out UPS. We'll probably get it today or tomorrow I'm guess. I think the extra party supplies should be here Tuesday or Wednesday.
Saturday I called and changed our cake order to the next larger cake. I didn't want to cut tiny pieces or run out of cake. I guess we'll just have some cake left over. It's supposed to be 75 on Saturday, so it should be a beautiful day for this birthday. I wish I knew what it was like on the day he was born. But, I had already been in the hospital for 2 days and had no idea.
So, that leaves me with buying ice cream, ice, party favors and pop. I'd also like to find some green and yellow ribbon for the balloons to go with the theme, but I'll live with whatever I can find. So far, no luck.
I figure that I can pick up the ice, ice cream and pop when I pick up the cake. Scott said he would try to take Friday off to help get his parents' property ready for the party. I'm getting really excited. I can't believe it's almost here!
Friday, April 13, 2007
Mind Test #1
Ok, cheating again . . .but here is today's mind candy since I don't have time for a real post.
This test is weird. Test yourself, but remember - The most important thing is to follow the instructions very carefully and not to scroll down too fast. Now, count the following easy calculations in your head as quickly as you can. It might help you if you say the answers aloud. Follow the instructions one at a time and as fast as possible.
How much is:
2 + 2?
8 + 8?
16 + 16?
Fast! Think of a number between 12 and 5.
Ready? Don't change your original number!
Scroll down!
The number you chose was 7. Strange, right?!?
This test is weird. Test yourself, but remember - The most important thing is to follow the instructions very carefully and not to scroll down too fast. Now, count the following easy calculations in your head as quickly as you can. It might help you if you say the answers aloud. Follow the instructions one at a time and as fast as possible.
How much is:
2 + 2?
8 + 8?
16 + 16?
Fast! Think of a number between 12 and 5.
Ready? Don't change your original number!
Scroll down!
The number you chose was 7. Strange, right?!?
Monday, April 09, 2007
Hippity, Hoppity
So, the Easter Bunny left Wyatt quite a few goodies. He got a basket in the shape of a truck, 2 books, a large bunny, 3 balls and a soft car from the movie "Cars". He also got one of those little chicks that peeps when you place it on your hand.
Saturday, April 07, 2007
Can you hear me now?
I was thinking the other day about Wyatt's toy telephone. Why do they still make this toy telephone when all of the telephones he sees are cordless?
Friday, April 06, 2007
Toilet Bowl Cleaning Instructions
Toilet Cleaning Instructions
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/2 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe her while you carry her towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids quickly. You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, for the cat is actually enjoying this --these are normal. Nothing is wrong with the cat or your toilet.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a "power-wash"for both cat and toilet, and a rinse cycle.
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both toilet lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom,and run outside where she will dry herself off. Honestly, with no directions from you.
9. Now, both the commode and the cat are sparkling clean.
Sincerely, The Dog
Today's Educational Moment
In case you didn't know:
The international telephone dialing code for Antarctica is 672.
The international telephone dialing code for Antarctica is 672.
Thursday, April 05, 2007
So my bad typing is acceptable?
Today I am cheating again and pulling something from the internet and using it as my post.
The reasoning behind it is I have decided to give up on installing the driver for my printer so that it will play nice with Vista and I'm just going out to buy a new printer. Instead of installing that software that comes with it (unless it says it's Vista ready), I will simply go to the Lexmark website and download the driver and hopefully it will be like starting fresh. We will see. I'll try to get to the store to buy a new printer this weekend.
ANYWAY I saw this online and loved it . . .
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid!Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.Amzanig huh?
The reasoning behind it is I have decided to give up on installing the driver for my printer so that it will play nice with Vista and I'm just going out to buy a new printer. Instead of installing that software that comes with it (unless it says it's Vista ready), I will simply go to the Lexmark website and download the driver and hopefully it will be like starting fresh. We will see. I'll try to get to the store to buy a new printer this weekend.
ANYWAY I saw this online and loved it . . .
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid!Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.Amzanig huh?
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Help
Ok . . . so a certain company that makes printers . . . let's call them Hexmark . . . finally put out the driver to make my printer work with Vista. So, it should be simple, go to the site, download the new driver and VOILA, right? WRONG!
I go to the website and start to go thru the process. Now to be fair, it did tell me to uninstall the old version of the driver first . . .which I of course ignored. But, in the end it didn't work. So, I decided to use their "online help chat". I'm putting that in quotes because I'm not sure how helpful or chatty it was. The first time I "chatted" they told me to uninstall the old version, reinstall the new one and everything would work. No dice.
So, like a fool, I tried the "online help chat" again. I am copying and pasting the exact "chat" here . . . you tell me how helpful it was:
Someone will be with you shortly...
[Arlene Davis] I downloaded the driver to make my Lexmark 7170 work with Vista. It now says the printer is not communicating. I have been thru all the troubleshooting steps.
[Vicky] Welcome to Lexmark Chat Support.
[Vicky] I shall help you with this issue.\ (ok, at the point, I'm guessing that Vicky is in India and this is not her real name. It's like the witness protection program.)
[Vicky] What is the error message that you get when you try to install the printer on your computer?
[Arlene Davis] It installs and then when I go to print the alignment page it says that the printer is not communicating. (Apparently that wasn't clear above.)
[Vicky] Please give me 2 minutes while I check my resources. Thank you. (Insert me literally humming the theme song to Jeopardy here.)
[Vicky] Thank you for waiting.
[Vicky] Please click here to install the Vista drivers on to your computer.
[Vicky] Please uninstall All copies, unplug the USB cable and then reinstall and not plug the USB cable in until the software prompts them to do it. The customer is likely using the wrong driver. It is very important to make sure all versions of the driver are uninstalled before trying to reinstall..it might take 1-2 times of uninstalling and reinstalling to get it to work. (ok, there's a couple of things wrong with this. #1. She is talking to me about me in the third person. #2. Their solution is to try it a couple of times again until it works?)
[Arlene Davis] Ok, I will give that a try. Thank you. (At this point, I've given up on them.)
[Vicky] Is there anything else I could assist you with?
[Arlene Davis] No, that was plenty. Thanks.
[Vicky] It's a pleasure helping you. Thanks for choosing Lexmark Chat Support. Have a Good Day. (Help is such a loose term for what she was doing . . .and it was late in the evening in Indiana . . .altho I'm sure it was early in the morning in India.)
[Vicky] You're welcome; it's been nice to assist you today.
[Vicky] Please do complete the chat survey by clicking on the "End" tab, with overall 5 being the best, as this will help us to better our service. Thank you. (Yeah, I skipped the survey because I didn't feel that Vicky would be getting a raise based on any survey response I might be giving her.)
So, it still didn't work. And now it says the file is not executable. I'm about to hang myself by my USB cable.
I go to the website and start to go thru the process. Now to be fair, it did tell me to uninstall the old version of the driver first . . .which I of course ignored. But, in the end it didn't work. So, I decided to use their "online help chat". I'm putting that in quotes because I'm not sure how helpful or chatty it was. The first time I "chatted" they told me to uninstall the old version, reinstall the new one and everything would work. No dice.
So, like a fool, I tried the "online help chat" again. I am copying and pasting the exact "chat" here . . . you tell me how helpful it was:
Someone will be with you shortly...
[Arlene Davis] I downloaded the driver to make my Lexmark 7170 work with Vista. It now says the printer is not communicating. I have been thru all the troubleshooting steps.
[Vicky] Welcome to Lexmark Chat Support.
[Vicky] I shall help you with this issue.\ (ok, at the point, I'm guessing that Vicky is in India and this is not her real name. It's like the witness protection program.)
[Vicky] What is the error message that you get when you try to install the printer on your computer?
[Arlene Davis] It installs and then when I go to print the alignment page it says that the printer is not communicating. (Apparently that wasn't clear above.)
[Vicky] Please give me 2 minutes while I check my resources. Thank you. (Insert me literally humming the theme song to Jeopardy here.)
[Vicky] Thank you for waiting.
[Vicky] Please click here to install the Vista drivers on to your computer.
[Vicky] Please uninstall All copies, unplug the USB cable and then reinstall and not plug the USB cable in until the software prompts them to do it. The customer is likely using the wrong driver. It is very important to make sure all versions of the driver are uninstalled before trying to reinstall..it might take 1-2 times of uninstalling and reinstalling to get it to work. (ok, there's a couple of things wrong with this. #1. She is talking to me about me in the third person. #2. Their solution is to try it a couple of times again until it works?)
[Arlene Davis] Ok, I will give that a try. Thank you. (At this point, I've given up on them.)
[Vicky] Is there anything else I could assist you with?
[Arlene Davis] No, that was plenty. Thanks.
[Vicky] It's a pleasure helping you. Thanks for choosing Lexmark Chat Support. Have a Good Day. (Help is such a loose term for what she was doing . . .and it was late in the evening in Indiana . . .altho I'm sure it was early in the morning in India.)
[Vicky] You're welcome; it's been nice to assist you today.
[Vicky] Please do complete the chat survey by clicking on the "End" tab, with overall 5 being the best, as this will help us to better our service. Thank you. (Yeah, I skipped the survey because I didn't feel that Vicky would be getting a raise based on any survey response I might be giving her.)
So, it still didn't work. And now it says the file is not executable. I'm about to hang myself by my USB cable.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Today's Funny
A co-worker sent this to me today. Yes, I know it's cheating rather than writing a real post. And, I've read this before, but it did make me laugh . . . again.
How To Shower Like a Woman:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror – make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower.
Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with real passion fruit.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower and stand on bath mat.
Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
How To Shower Like a Man:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the “woo-hoo” sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
Get in the shower.
Wash your face.
Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Avoid bath mat.
Dry off forearms and butt only.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Shake it to watch water fly off.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the “woo-hoo” sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at > the truth behind this, there is something so very wrong with you.
How To Shower Like a Woman:
Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror – make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower.
Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with real passion fruit.
Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
Rinse conditioner off hair.
Shave armpits and legs.
Turn off shower.
Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
Spray mold spots with Tilex.
Get out of shower and stand on bath mat.
Dry with towel the size of a small country.
Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
How To Shower Like a Man:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the “woo-hoo” sound.
Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass.
Get in the shower.
Wash your face.
Wash your armpits.
Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
Pee.
Rinse off and get out of shower.
Avoid bath mat.
Dry off forearms and butt only.
Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
Admire wiener size in mirror again.
Shake it to watch water fly off.
Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.
If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the “woo-hoo” sound again.
Throw wet towel on bed.
If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at > the truth behind this, there is something so very wrong with you.
Monday, April 02, 2007
Thank goodness the weekend is over!
I was looking forward to this last weekend so much. The last two weeks at work have been long ones.
But, this weekend proved to be busy, and long. Saturday was spent doing some shopping. Wyatt needed some new summer clothes. And, now it's supposed to dip back down into the 40's this week again. So, I cleaned out his room, dropped off the clothes that no longer fit to Goodwill, had some lunch with hubby and the tadpole at Steak N Shake (note to self, don't let hubby give Wyatt chili noodles ever again, more on that later) and we went to K-Mart. I bought Wyatt quite a few new clothes, including socks. Hubby bought some fishing stuff and I got a new hummingbird feeder since I broke the last one while cleaning it out for the season.
Yesterday hubby went fishing. That left Wyatt and me to go grocery shopping. I tried to get him to nap first . . . but NOOOOOO! So, I packed him in the car and then went to pack the rest of the stuff. By the time I packed all of it in (including the car seat that needed returned) and looked for the receipt for the car seat (which i could find) and unpacked the car seat . . . Wyatt was fairly cranky. Two minutes onto the highway, he was asleep. So, I thought I would go thru the drive-thru ATM to make a deposit to let him sleep a little longer. The ATM was out of order. Ok, strike 2 for today's plans.
He gave me a hard time most of the way thru Wal-Mart. He wanted me to hold him. But, I couldn't hold him and push the cart. I tried entertaining him by giving him his plastic keys but he kept throwing them down. So, I picked up a stuffed bunny from a shelf. He loved on it and played with it and cooed at it. In the middle of the grocery section, I realized that he had eaten half of the tag from it. No wonder the boy is constipated. That reminds me, the chili noodles turned out to be a nasty diaper changing episode Sunday morning before leaving for the store. By the time we got home from the store, we were both cranky. I gave him a bottle and took him into his room to rock him and put him down for a nap. Where I discovered that I hadn't put the sheets back on his bed from washing them that morning. Strike 3.
So, I did that, put him down for the nap, brought the groceries in and put them away, fed him and laid down on my bed (with no sheets because they were in the wash) and read for a little bit.
Once he got up, he spent the rest of the afternoon giving me a hard time. While in his walker, he figured out how to pull the keyboard drawer out on the computer desk and steal our cordless mouse. I kept scolding him and putting it back. I caught him doing it again and called him by first and last name. He yelled "NO!" at me (the first time he's done that), "ran" in his walker over to the cat and threw the mouse at her. He spent most of the afternoon stealing whatever he could and throwing it at her. By the time daddy got home from fishing, I was mentally and physically exhausted.
I still can't find the receipt to the car seat. But, a co-worker says I can take it back to Wal-Mart anyways and get store credit. I'll give it a try this week. We'll see.
It looks like the driver might be out for my printer to work with Vista. I can't wait to get home and try it.
I also need to see if I'm going to get our business taxes file in time or if I need to file an extension. The deadline is 2 weeks away and I haven't even started. YIKES! I had to file an extension because I know I'll just put it off until the last minute of THAT one.
But, this weekend proved to be busy, and long. Saturday was spent doing some shopping. Wyatt needed some new summer clothes. And, now it's supposed to dip back down into the 40's this week again. So, I cleaned out his room, dropped off the clothes that no longer fit to Goodwill, had some lunch with hubby and the tadpole at Steak N Shake (note to self, don't let hubby give Wyatt chili noodles ever again, more on that later) and we went to K-Mart. I bought Wyatt quite a few new clothes, including socks. Hubby bought some fishing stuff and I got a new hummingbird feeder since I broke the last one while cleaning it out for the season.
Yesterday hubby went fishing. That left Wyatt and me to go grocery shopping. I tried to get him to nap first . . . but NOOOOOO! So, I packed him in the car and then went to pack the rest of the stuff. By the time I packed all of it in (including the car seat that needed returned) and looked for the receipt for the car seat (which i could find) and unpacked the car seat . . . Wyatt was fairly cranky. Two minutes onto the highway, he was asleep. So, I thought I would go thru the drive-thru ATM to make a deposit to let him sleep a little longer. The ATM was out of order. Ok, strike 2 for today's plans.
He gave me a hard time most of the way thru Wal-Mart. He wanted me to hold him. But, I couldn't hold him and push the cart. I tried entertaining him by giving him his plastic keys but he kept throwing them down. So, I picked up a stuffed bunny from a shelf. He loved on it and played with it and cooed at it. In the middle of the grocery section, I realized that he had eaten half of the tag from it. No wonder the boy is constipated. That reminds me, the chili noodles turned out to be a nasty diaper changing episode Sunday morning before leaving for the store. By the time we got home from the store, we were both cranky. I gave him a bottle and took him into his room to rock him and put him down for a nap. Where I discovered that I hadn't put the sheets back on his bed from washing them that morning. Strike 3.
So, I did that, put him down for the nap, brought the groceries in and put them away, fed him and laid down on my bed (with no sheets because they were in the wash) and read for a little bit.
Once he got up, he spent the rest of the afternoon giving me a hard time. While in his walker, he figured out how to pull the keyboard drawer out on the computer desk and steal our cordless mouse. I kept scolding him and putting it back. I caught him doing it again and called him by first and last name. He yelled "NO!" at me (the first time he's done that), "ran" in his walker over to the cat and threw the mouse at her. He spent most of the afternoon stealing whatever he could and throwing it at her. By the time daddy got home from fishing, I was mentally and physically exhausted.
I still can't find the receipt to the car seat. But, a co-worker says I can take it back to Wal-Mart anyways and get store credit. I'll give it a try this week. We'll see.
It looks like the driver might be out for my printer to work with Vista. I can't wait to get home and try it.
I also need to see if I'm going to get our business taxes file in time or if I need to file an extension. The deadline is 2 weeks away and I haven't even started. YIKES! I had to file an extension because I know I'll just put it off until the last minute of THAT one.
Saturday, March 31, 2007
The TRUE Sign of Spring
My yard has disappeared into a pile of mud. Once again, Scott has turned it into a mudhole.
This is my back yard.
Signs of Spring Part Deux
So, I bought a new hummingbird feeder today. After filling it and putting it out on the porch, I did a once over of the yard to look for other signs of spring. I did come up with a few . . .
Signs of Spring
The signs of spring are really showing. We've been sleeping with the windows open. Wyatt and I have been for several walks. We've had just a few flowers pop up in our yard, although they are everywhere else.
Friday, March 30, 2007
I owe my Mom . . .
A co-worker sent this to me yesterday and it made me laugh out loud. Now, I hope that I will not say these things . . . but I know I will . . .
I OWE MY MOTHER .....
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that this will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER .
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPERBOLE.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOUR .
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS .
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you."
I OWE MY MOTHER .....
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that this will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS .
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER .
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPERBOLE.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING .
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOUR .
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS .
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you."
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Facination
Today's post is a facination of mine . . . it's about shopping.
It's not that I LIKE to go to the store, but the store facinates me. Not just the grocery store, but lots of stores. You can go to one place (particularly Super stores) and get so many types of things. It's a one stop place to get the things you need to run your household.
You see all types of people. They each have their mental or paper list of things that they need. And each list is as different as the people are. It's amazing. I like to step back and watch people looking over their lists and marking things off. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm a people watcher.
And speaking of lists . . . how do people go to the store without a paper list? If I go to the store without a paper list and even just need a few things, I usually leave with 3 or 4 other things that I realized that I needed while in the store, but forget at least one of the items that I had planned on buying before I went into the store.
Yesterday I thought I had a good day. Hubby took Baby Boo Boo to Nana's in the morning. So, I left from home to go to Wal-Mart to get a new umbrella stroller, two calculators (Wyatt threw our remaining one behind the couch over the weekend) and some postcard stock for his birthday invitations. I didn't get the postcard stock because they didn't have it. But, at lunch, I got the postcard stock at Office Depot along with an organizer that I needed and some AA batteries. . . a good day, yes?
Then, when I got to Nana's, she let me know that she needed teething tablets and baby Tylenol. So, guess where I need to go to today? I decided against Wal-Mart and I will go to K-Mart and pick up some formula since it will save me the trip over the weekend.
Next Friday, we have the afternoon off at work. I think it's Good Friday. I have big plans. Baby Boo Boo will stay at Nana's and I will go get a haircut and make my Wal-Mart and Kroger trip and not have to run those errands over the weekend.
It's not that I LIKE to go to the store, but the store facinates me. Not just the grocery store, but lots of stores. You can go to one place (particularly Super stores) and get so many types of things. It's a one stop place to get the things you need to run your household.
You see all types of people. They each have their mental or paper list of things that they need. And each list is as different as the people are. It's amazing. I like to step back and watch people looking over their lists and marking things off. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm a people watcher.
And speaking of lists . . . how do people go to the store without a paper list? If I go to the store without a paper list and even just need a few things, I usually leave with 3 or 4 other things that I realized that I needed while in the store, but forget at least one of the items that I had planned on buying before I went into the store.
Yesterday I thought I had a good day. Hubby took Baby Boo Boo to Nana's in the morning. So, I left from home to go to Wal-Mart to get a new umbrella stroller, two calculators (Wyatt threw our remaining one behind the couch over the weekend) and some postcard stock for his birthday invitations. I didn't get the postcard stock because they didn't have it. But, at lunch, I got the postcard stock at Office Depot along with an organizer that I needed and some AA batteries. . . a good day, yes?
Then, when I got to Nana's, she let me know that she needed teething tablets and baby Tylenol. So, guess where I need to go to today? I decided against Wal-Mart and I will go to K-Mart and pick up some formula since it will save me the trip over the weekend.
Next Friday, we have the afternoon off at work. I think it's Good Friday. I have big plans. Baby Boo Boo will stay at Nana's and I will go get a haircut and make my Wal-Mart and Kroger trip and not have to run those errands over the weekend.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Funny Statistics
These may or may not be true . . .but I liked them.
In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was
allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence, we have "the rule of thumb!"
-------------------------------------------
Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented.
It was ruled "Gentlemen Only ... Ladies Forbidden"...
Thus, the word GOLF entered into the English language.
-------------------------------------------
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV
were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
-------------------------------------------
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the
U.S.Treasury.
-------------------------------------------
Men can read smaller print than women can;
women can hear better.
-------------------------------------------
Coca-Cola was originally green.
-------------------------------------------
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
-------------------------------------------
The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work:
Alaska
-------------------------------------------
The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...)
-------------------------------------------
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
--------------------------------------------------------------------
The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
---------------------------------------------------------------------
The average number of people airborne over the U.S.
in any given hour: 61,000
--------------------------------------------------------------
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
--------------------------------------------------------------
The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
--------------------------------------------------------------
The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile
National Monuments.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents
a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
----------------------------------------------------------
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
----------------------------------------------------------
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs
in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg
in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of
natural causes.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th,
John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on
August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most
popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go
until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day
of the year?
A. Father's Day
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames
by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened,
making the bed firmer to sleep on.
Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that
for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply
his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a
honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based,
this period was called the honey month, which we know today
as the honeymoon.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England,
when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them
"Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down."
It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked
into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill,
they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the
phrase inspired by this practice.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was
allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence, we have "the rule of thumb!"
-------------------------------------------
Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented.
It was ruled "Gentlemen Only ... Ladies Forbidden"...
Thus, the word GOLF entered into the English language.
-------------------------------------------
The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV
were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
-------------------------------------------
Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the
U.S.Treasury.
-------------------------------------------
Men can read smaller print than women can;
women can hear better.
-------------------------------------------
Coca-Cola was originally green.
-------------------------------------------
It is impossible to lick your elbow.
-------------------------------------------
The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work:
Alaska
-------------------------------------------
The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...)
-------------------------------------------
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
--------------------------------------------------------------------
The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
---------------------------------------------------------------------
The average number of people airborne over the U.S.
in any given hour: 61,000
--------------------------------------------------------------
Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
--------------------------------------------------------------
The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
--------------------------------------------------------------
The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile
National Monuments.
-------------------------------------------------------------
Each king in a deck of playing cards represents
a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
----------------------------------------------------------
111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
----------------------------------------------------------
If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs
in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg
in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of
natural causes.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th,
John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on
August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most
popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go
until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day
of the year?
A. Father's Day
----------------------------------------------------------------------
In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames
by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened,
making the bed firmer to sleep on.
Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that
for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply
his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a
honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based,
this period was called the honey month, which we know today
as the honeymoon.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England,
when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them
"Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down."
It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked
into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill,
they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the
phrase inspired by this practice.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
~~~~~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
My daily horoscope . . .
Ok, I thought it would be interesting to post my horoscope once in a while in then compare it to how my day really turned out.
When I searched for daily horoscope, one of the results came up as:
Select an animal below to read your daily horoscope:. Please choose one, Rat, Ox, Goat, Dragon, Rabbit, Monkey, Dog, Pig, Snake, Tiger, Rooster, Horse ...
I just about fell out of my chair laughing. I'm sure they are referring to the chinese "year of" things . . .but I instantly heard (in my mind) my horoscope being read by a monkey.
It totally distracted me from actually looking up my horoscope.
Sorry. My lack of attention span and my procrastination tends to cause things like that. I DID get my hair colored and took Wyatt for a walk over the weekend though. And, I returned my crutches today. Not too bad.
When I searched for daily horoscope, one of the results came up as:
Select an animal below to read your daily horoscope:. Please choose one, Rat, Ox, Goat, Dragon, Rabbit, Monkey, Dog, Pig, Snake, Tiger, Rooster, Horse ...
I just about fell out of my chair laughing. I'm sure they are referring to the chinese "year of" things . . .but I instantly heard (in my mind) my horoscope being read by a monkey.
It totally distracted me from actually looking up my horoscope.
Sorry. My lack of attention span and my procrastination tends to cause things like that. I DID get my hair colored and took Wyatt for a walk over the weekend though. And, I returned my crutches today. Not too bad.
Monday, March 26, 2007
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